Campus News

Your go-to news-hub for stuff that totally actually happened.

President Donald Trump has recently disclosed his plans to the press regarding a surprise decision to take a hard-earned vacation to the Oval Office. Donny T, who has been putting in long hours working on his expertly crafted 140-character nuggets of truth while slaving away …

NEW YORK – Rejoicing in the television ratings boost brought by President Donald Trump’s campaign and election, NBC has renewed Trump for a second season as president. “Since Trump announced his candidacy and called Mexicans rapists we refused to let him near our entertainment programming, …

WASHINGTON, D.C. – Following backlash to all of his previous executive orders, Trump has signed a new executive order requesting everyone “be nice to him.” When asked about the new order, Trump added, “This job is haaaaaarrrd! And you guys keep saying all these mean …

ARMONK, NY – Quickly becoming the world’s most advanced cognitive computing system, IBM’s Watson is reportedly a really smart monkey in a cardboard box. “We just found him in the jungle and brought him back here to headquarters in Armonk” said IBM’s Principal Investigator, David …

BOZEMAN, MT – Eliza Shaffer, a freshman at Willow High School in suburban Montana was shocked today when she found out that the world, in fact, does not revolve around her. Shaffer was quoted in a recent interview saying, “it just seemed like I was …

1 2 3 13