Ode to a Fake Account


Dear man on my Tinder and Plenty Of Fish,

I know for a fact you are a catfish.


The same boring bio and perfect ab pic,

I’m one DM away from seeing your dick.


You stay mostly silent, til you’re looking to fuck,

Then I get that one text, “hey r u up?”


You are not creative or fooling me slightly,

But damn your avi is pretty dang sightly.


Still, I cannot trust you, PoonLover6969,

So the end of our friendship really is nigh.


I need to delete this insidious app,

But first, can I get one final snap?


Morgan Schultz, Staff Member